[全]2020年哈尔滨中考英语作文原题、参考范文与作文讲解

2020年哈尔滨中考英语作文原题、参考范文与作文讲解

作文真题

假如你是中学生李平，曾在你们班学习的交换生Peter看了你发布的朋友圈，他对你们班上周举行了主题班会很感兴趣，请你根据以下信息给他写一封信，向他介绍班会的情况，并和他交流一下中学生如何才能实现自己的理想。

1. 班会主题：我的理想

2. 介绍你和几名同学的理想

（1）赵勇：想成为一名勇敢的警察

（2）张红：想做一名志愿者

（3）你：想成为一名优秀的医生

3. 说说中学生如何才能实现自己的理想（ideal）

参考范文

Dear Peter,

How is everthing going? I am very happy to receive your letter. In your letter,

you expressed your interest in the class meeting held in our class last week. Now, I will introduce it to you in detail. The topic is “my dream”, and some students, including me, talked about our dreams. Zhao Yong said he wants to be a brave policeman, while Zhang Hong prefers to be a volunteer doing as many good things as possible. For me, my dream is to become an excellent doctor, because that will give me a sense of satisfaction and fulfilment.

When it comes to how to make my dream come true, I have to do the following things. The most important point is that I must study hard. I am just a middle school student now, so I am short of necessary knowledge. Therefore, I’d like to devote all my time to studying and go to a good university in the future. The second thing that I have to do is to get more experience in the medical filed. I will take part in more social activities that will help me understand more about a doctor’s work. Anyway, as long as I keep working and don’t give up, my dream will come true in the near future.

How about you? What’s your dream? Write to me and let me know.

Best wishes.

Yours,

Li Ping

讲评部分

Dear Peter,

How is everthing going? I am very happy to receive your letter.（本句的功能在于书信的基本寒暄，属于常见套句，同学们写作可以简单，但不可以有语法错误）In your letter, you expressed your interest in the class meeting held in our class last week.（本句处理上有点小技巧。我用 expressed your interest一个动词即可，避免运用expressed that you are interested in这样两个动词出现，且回避我们不知道are究竟该不该也用过去时的纠结。） Now, I will introduce it to you in detail. （本句是个段落内部的过渡句）The topic is “my dream”, and some students, including me（including的使用可以明显替代and，且让句子结构高级）, talked about our dreams. Zhao Yong said he wants（他现在也有这个梦想，因此需要用现在时，不用过去时） to be a brave policeman, while Zhang Hong prefers to be a volunteer doing as many good things as possible（doing做后置定语，使表达更灵活，句子充满更多细节）. For me, my dream is to become an excellent doctor, because that will give me a sense of satisfaction and fulfilment（because的使用，使得句子变长了，充满了细节）.

When it comes to how to make my dream come true（这是本段句首的引导，引出本段的主题）, I have to do the following things. The most important point（这个用法多少要比first好一点） is that I must study hard. I am just a middle school student now, so I am short of necessary knowledge. Therefore（连接词的使用使得句子有衔接感）, I’d like to devote all my time to studying and go to a good university in the future. The second thing that I have to do is to get more experience in the medical filed（这个句子里面有定语从句，且有second跟低一点照应，语义比较连贯）. I will take part in more social activities that will help me understand more about a doctor’s work. Anyway, as long as I keep working and

don’t give up, my dream will come true in the near future.（anyway的衔接，以及本句作为总结句的收尾，都再次紧扣主题）

How about you? What’s your dream? Write to me and let me know. （这几句符合书信的寒暄原则，问问对方情况，也属于人之常情）

总结

无论是哪个层级的英语考试，只要是英语考试里的作文，基本都要注意一下几个问题：

• 要保证基本的语言使用准确。这里说的就是语法问题，不能有语法上的错误。

• 要保证尽可能的语言使用地道一些。很多中国学生写作文，充满了中式句子。都是按照母语的语言习惯而用单词拼凑起来的句子，这样的句子虽然有语法的约束而语法正确，但说出来的句子很别扭，要尽量杜绝这类句子。

• 要让文章充满连贯性。如何才能让作文充满连贯，需要专门的训练。但基本的逻辑是“起承转合上下呼应”这八个字。英语的句子是珍珠，连接词就是线。就是有了连接词，才能让句子整体串联起来。没有了连接词，英语的句子构不成一个整体，不能成为一个好的段落。

• 如果可能把词汇替换的高级一点，句子长短句结合、自然一点。不要通篇晦涩难懂的单词或长句子，过犹不及。通篇有个别的单词使用恰到好处即可。句子上一定长短结合才符合语言逻辑。

• 还有一些跟考试特点相关的要求，需要注意。比如中考要求各个要点要都体现。要点缺失要扣分等，注意一下即可。